Highest Scoring Team ($15)
Brett’s Regrets
Coach Drew
156.16 pts
Highest Scoring Player ($7)
Curtis’s High Speed Explorer
Coach Nick
Patriots DST - 41.9 pts
Pickup of the Week
BRADYTRAIN
Coach Brady
John Ross - 19.70 points
$51 Waiver Pickup
High Bid of the Week
see above
Bench of the Week
Big Brett’s Big Year
Coach Joe
Dak Prescott - 28.16 pts
Benched for Drew Brees - -1.48 pts
After a record breaking offensive season last year in the NFL & IFL, we are having 2017 all over again. Last year we averaged as a league 129 PPG through the first two weeks. In 2017, 114 PPG. This season? 115 PPG. Broken quarterbacks everywhere you look, and the teams with healthy ones aren’t having last year’s season. Except for the Chiefs, and obviously the Patriots. No shootouts so far this season, and defense is winning championships. To hammer that point home, we have for the first time in IFL history, a DST winning Player of the Week, the Patriots DST (37.4 pts), who got 7 sacks, 4 INTs, two TDs and allowed 0 points for Nick and Curtis’s High Speed Explorer, who walloped the #1 power-ranked Scallon Express by 41. McCaffrey suffered the Thursday Night Football blues and Josh Gordon was neglected with AB being TB12’s new toy. Scallon will look to rebound next week against another Cul-de-Sack squad, Hunt’s Promise Land, who beat division rival Big Brett’s Big Year 108-94. Joe was one the broken QB victims, losing Brees to a torn ligament in his right thumb.
Jesse was another victim, losing Big Ben for the season but he had started Josh Allen this week against the HypeZone and his 22 points and another 48 from Sanders and Kelce helped him to get the win 130-105 and claim the $20 Bounty. The Bills are 2-0 and the Wyoming alum could make the Big Ben loss more tolerable for 3-2-1 SPIKE!, who is 2-0 for the first time in his team’s history. Hype Zone falls to 0-2 for the first time since the very first season of the IFL after some bad performances from Mixon and OJ Howard.
Our Game of the Week was won by TC and the skyrocketing Don’t Mess With the Zoquon, thanks to another 34 point performance from Lamar Jackson. Tough to handle a QB that can put up 120 yards on the ground, let alone the fact he has Barkley and Ekeler putting up another 46 points. Look the hell out if Diggs and Kittle start turning it on. TC is out here to get rings, starting off 2-0 for the 2nd season in a row. The Bucknaked Bradys start 0-2, which is also a feat they pulled last year; however, they would post wins in Weeks 3 & 4, so don’t sleep on them just yet.
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The BRADYTRAIN is rolling, and looking to erase all memory of last season from the record books, which will prove difficult with so many physical copies of his shame spread across the country. TB12, Zeke, and Derick Henry nearly outscored Aaron this week by themselves, posting a combined 65, to Aaron’s 68. Both teams roll to 1-1, but clearly one has a little more momentum.
Drew’s team is always good. Wow, cool. It’s the way he’s always good that really sucks though. MARK FREAKING ANDREWS?!??!?!??!??!??!??!?! 😡 He posts best score this week with 156, and destroys the Doc by 45, who falls to 1-1.
In some good news, one Big Talk host got a win this week thanks to a Njoku injury, and 26 from Aaron Jones, Papa Jord’s moves to 1-1, as Handlebar Enthusiasts fall to 0-2 in their return to the IFL. Nobody said it was going to be easy Hunt.
All of us 0-2 idiots can be happy we’re not Tony this week, who lost by .02 to Brat10. I would rather lose by 1,000 than suffer that fate.
Of the 12 teams that have started out 0-2, 2 have made the playoffs, so there’s a sliver of hope yet, boys.
Another solid week from DD&B, and they remain ahead of the pack.
Division Overall W-L:
DD&B: 74-46
BSC: 58-62
CdS: 54-66
X-IA: 54-66
The pickers consensus goes 4 for 4, along with 6 pickers, a pretty predictable week. How quaint.
“Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.” — Henry David Thoreau
My motivation for the week.