Highest Scoring Team ($15)
Team Badassmailmain
Coach Aaron
186.26 pts
Highest Scoring Player ($7)
NOSCOPE TRENT
Coach Zach
Derrick Henry - 38.2 pts
(Haason Reddick scored 43.8 points, but wasn’t rostered.)
Pickup of the Week
Scallon Exress
Coach Jack
Taysom Hill
$10 Waiver Pickup - 18.94 pts in Week 14
High Bid of the Week
Team jbrhodes6
Coach Joe
Ty Johnson
$14 Waiver Pickup - 1.6 pts in Week 14
Bench of the Week
Team jbrhodes6
Coach Joe
Baker Mayfield - 29.52 pts
Benched for Cam Newton - 3.86 pts
If you were fortunate enough to be one of the four coaches on bye this week of the playoffs, it was the first time in three and a half months you were able to breath. Or sleep. Or in Brady’s case, shower. Coach Brady, who is now in his fifth day of brutal COVID symptoms, said: “this was the best week I’ve had since I won the 2016 IFL Championship.”
If you were not that fortunate, you were forced into the crucible, where your contents were proved to be formidable, or crumble under the immense pressure.
In the championship playoffs, we had both of our quarterfinal games come down to Monday Night Football, one of which, ended up being a “show you who’s daddy” type of game. Mr. Nelson, who started off the night down 37 points, brought out the paddle last night, and showed TC why he is NOT his roommate. Mr. Nelson is, in fact, his landlord. Lamar Jackson and Kareem Hunt combined for 66 points, and much like the toilet that Lamar dominated mid-4th quarter last night, TC got crapped on, 186-158. TC’s chance at a repeat came to an embarrassing end, losing his final four games, failing to give any real threat at collecting his second infinity stone. Though, to his credit, all three coaches he beat out for the final wildcard spot (Austin, Zach & John) would have also lost to Aaron this week, who scored the most points in the league. Aaron, who has been to the championship playoffs only once before, where he lost to Jack’s 2017 IFL Champion Bellhops in the semifinals, returns to the semifinals as the only coach of the final four, who has not previously claimed a ring.
Our other championship quarterfinal game was much more of a nailbiter, as PROFESSOR DISRESPECT entered the MNF matchup down just 9.22 points to Dumped by Hollie, and still possessed his Miles Garrett card, who had been good for that many points 8 out of 11 games this season. Miles scored 2 points on the Ravens first offensive possession, and things were looking good for the PROFESSOR but then Miles exited the game in the 2nd quarter after hurting his elbow. He returned shortly thereafter, but didn’t bode well for Jord’s chances. At halftime, Coach Jord was seen giving himself a kemosabe, in a wild attempt to not take it out on his players. While Lamar was taking his mid-game twenty deuce, it was 3rd & 2 with 2:12 left in the game, and Miles Garrett tackled McSorley for a loss of 3 yards to give him 5.5 points. But, McSorley was injured on the play, and, back off the can, here comes Lamar freaking Jackson, to not only play late-game hero, but to continue avoiding the Miles Garrett for the remainder of the game, as he had done heretofore. Thus, Nick stayed on top of this one, 168-164, and moves on to the semifinals, where he has been twice before.
In our consolation playoffs, Joe & Scallon moved on quite handily, knocking off Ewoldt & Qualley respectively. Ewoldt, who started off the season 5-0, finishes it 1-8, a feat that I will continue to talk about for some time. Qualley, who was once filled with such youthful rookie promise, at the peak of pre-season hype in power rankings, after his Hangover Draft, has now come to the end of the ride. Condolences, young padawan. But now you may sit back, enjoy the playoffs, and prepare your mind & body for 2021.
CHAMPIONSHIP PLAYOFFS
consolation PLAYOFFS
tournament to not be last
History was made in the TTNBL this week, with the league’s first ever forfeiture. Drew, who outed himself for tampering with one his own players, withdrew from his contest with the Pop Punk Pirates early on Monday, after what looked like a certain victory, being up some 26 points and Jesse only having Cody Parkey left to play, someone who literally shakes whenever he steps onto the field. Drew’s self-alleged actions will be investigated thoroughly by IFL authorities, but in the meantime he will be relegated to the Tournament to Not Be Last Losership Game against 2017 IFL LotY Hunt, who lost an ugly low-scoring game against 2019 IFL LotY Curtis 104-112. Hunt v Drew, should be a truly horrific matchup.
As the playoffs ramp up, so does pick ‘em, and as short as Jord came up in the playoffs, he did even worse in pick ‘em, putting up a goose egg. Meanwhile Brady and Nick go perfect, Brady climbing into the top individual spot, and Nick climbing into a tie for 2nd-best individual spot.
Two more wins, and you are the 2020 IFL Champion. How hard can that be?