Highest Scoring Team ($15)
IFL’s 3-Peat Pick ‘Em Champ
Coach Curtis
170.01 pts (most by any team this season)
Highest Scoring Player ($7)
No Nonsense Nelson
Coach Aaron (3rd time in 4 weeks!)
Derrick Henry - 34.1 pts
The fantasy football gods are cruel and fickle.
-Albert Einstein
One moment you’re 2-0 and have the highest power-ranked team in the league. Riding so high with so many good WRs, that they’re leaking out of every orifice, and you trade one away to get the GOAT QB Patrick Mahomes. Two weeks later, you’re 2-2, as that very same GOAT ends the CAREER of your #1 player and WR Rashee Rice in the stupidest attempt at a tackle I’ve ever seen. To say I’m devastated is an understatement. It’s more like a silent, endless void I now find myself in. Just nothing but blackness… . . . . .
Anyway, my misfortune this week led to the Scallon Express getting their very first win of the season this week, beating Spawn of Satan 104-80, and that is something worth celebrating. Congrats, old friend!
As a matter of fact, among our IFL-record FOUR 0-3 teams, THREE of them added their first game to the win column, as A-Rich’s Kenneth Walker, and Younghoe Koo put up 54 points on Duncan, and won 118-87, and Jesse and the Aspen Dummies got 73 points from Baker, Conner, and Evans, to bury the TCU 125-97.
Our 2023 champ Nick; however, moved to 0-4, turning in a season-low 67.91 points against the Doc. Nick, has an all-play record of 3-57 through four weeks, is actually really impressive, if you think about it. Amazingly, it’s not the worst all-play through four weeks in IFL history, that record belongs to the 2021 Austin-led Snyder Cut, who had a 2-58 all-play record. And even more amazing, is the fact that the Snyder Cut would turn around and win their next fives games, turning in a 58-17 all-play record in weeks 5-9. Never quit, boys!
On the other end of the spectrum, Curtis, the IFL’s 3-Peat Pick ‘Em Champ kicks Ewoldt off the course 170-108, the highest score by any team this season. It’s also the second time in three weeks Curtis has had the honor of highest scoring team, and it gives his team the highest average score in the league at 134 PPG. Curtis moves to 3-1 and is now in command of the Cul-de-Sack.
Trailing in scoring by 8 PPG, the next highest scoring team in the league, No Nonsense Nelson sends Brady to the cleaners 148-86, this time on the back of Derrick Henry. Incredibly, Nelson has won the weekly award for highest scoring player three times in four weeks, a truly unreal run. The all-time record is 5 on a season, so he has a shot. He moves to 3-1 and takes over the Boy Scout Cyclones.
The aforementioned Ewoldt loss means that no team made it to 4-0, and that’s a first since 2018. It also opens the door to the X-IA division, and the Doc and Hunt walk right through it with their victories this week. Hunt sent Jord and the Control Room into a frenzy, 128-95. Hunt has now won three straight, and is tied for the second best all-play record in the league at 41-19. The Control Room, marred by injuries, is getting desperate and the rumorous flames of its demise are swirling faster than they can be put out.
Enjoy the good times while they last, men, until you too join me in the darkness.
X-IA’s lead is cut to 22, as the BSC gets even. PJ has a strong week to tie things up at 3rd with the CdS.
TC and the Commish navigate a tricky week of pick ‘em to take share of the lead.
