Highest Scoring Team ($15)
Tuna with Mustard
Coach Jack
153.31 pts
Highest Scoring Player ($7)
TC Schefter
Coach TC
CJ Stroud - 40.8 pts
9 weeks in, what is the story of the season thus far? It’s got to be X-Iowa.
To illustrate, let’s take a look at the current playoff seeding if the season ended today:
Ewoldt’s Course Rangers (7-2) [X-IA Champ]
Qualley’s DSM Football Team (6-3) [Papa Jord Champ]
Nick’s Curtis’ Bronco Coat (5-4) [Cul-de-Sack Champ]
John’s Scallon Express (5-4) [Boy Scout Cyclone Champ]
Jesse’s La Bamba (6-3) [Wildcard] X-IA
Hunt’s Groovers (6-3) [Wildcard] X-IA
Austin’s Goffpocalpyse (4-5) [PPG] Papa Jord’s
Jack’s Tuna with Mustard (4-5) [PPG] X-IA
That’s right, currently, all four X-IA teams are in playoff position. Still five weeks to go, of course, so much things may change, but it sheds light on the fact that X-IA has been rolling.
And intrigue in that division heats up, as Ewoldt dropped their second straight loss after starting off the season 7-0, this week to a guy who clearly just wants it more, Brady, and his ragtag gang of circus clowns, who have somehow managed to average 3rd most points in the league over the last four weeks and have clawed their way above .500. They knock off the Course Rangers 133-117, and Ewoldt’s division lead falls to just a single game. Ewoldt, for what it’s worth, is still the 4th highest scoring team in the league, so don’t worry about him too much.
The teams taking advantage of Ewoldt’s loss - La Bamba and the Groovers - both continue their win streaks. Jesse’s league best, five consecutive wins, this week comes curtesy of a defensive struggle against Austin, with 11 of their 18 players scoring less than 10 points. Jesse, who played his 3rd best QB option, as it turned out, didn’t need any better anyway, and would win 78-68. Before you wonder about Goffpocalypse, just know that his top 3 players were all on bye. He’ll also be fine. Hunt would also grind out a win, in our Game of the Week, against Nelson, winning 99-91. Hunt and Jesse get to within a game of Ewoldt in X-IA, amazingly, after what seemed like a potential runaway title for the Course Rangers.
And then there’s Tuna with Mustard, who like the Bengals, are getting healthy again, and boy is that scary. The Doc had lost 5 out of 6 games for a stretch there, but you score enough points on the season, and you can still earn a playoff bid, and they came out with surgical precision in week 9, doubling up on the Scallon Express 153-65. Boy, has the Scallon Express taken a long detour or what? After starting the season 5-1, and looking like the bus out of Speed, the Express has dropped 3 games in a row, and though clearly still stacked with talent, will look to get back on track in Week 10. Luckily for the Express, the whole Boy Scout Cyclone division would lose this week: Drew losing to Jord 77-103, Aaron losing to Hunt, and Chris losing to Nick 75-89, which means that they’ll maintain their one game lead in the division.
Finally, I would be remiss if I did not highlight Qualley’s Des Moines Football Team a bit. We don’t have to get into who they played this week or the fact that that team has lost 7 straight games, or why and how there’s irrefutable proof that that team is cursed, but rather, let’s talk about Qualley. I mean, the handsome devil, er… angel, won this week against a team that shall not be named 136-129, improving to 6-3, and maintains a one-game lead in Papa Jord’s. But with the score, they’ve become the highest scoring team in the league, averaging 119 PPG, and have averaged 128 PPG over the last four weeks, also a league best. And it’s the depth that’s scary. His fifth highest scorer, Michael Pittman, is averaging 14.7 PPG on the season, a full 2.7 PPG higher than the next best fifth man in the league. His #2 scorer, the Sun God, on bye this week? No problem, I’ll just motivate my rookie, Tank Dell, 2023 Name of the Year Winner, to drop a 30-burger. I’m just saying, if you’re going to lose your 7th straight game, I’d want it to be him. And Qualley is him.
X-IA takes over as the top division on the season, as the Boy Scout Cyclones have an all-time bad week. They posted 3 of the bottom 4 scores, and earned an all-play record of 11-49. Oof.
Your commissioner posts a perfect week to tie things up with Qualley, and the Pickers’ Consensus slips into first place. Fun fact: the Pickers’ Consensus has never finished the season on top, but has gotten 2nd place 4 times. It’s also, thus far, a highly unpredictable season, as the consensus percentage is only 52%, and the lowest it has ever been for a season is 61%.
