Highest Scoring Team ($15)
ALL-TIME D
Coach Brady
165.09 pts
Highest Scoring Player ($7)
No Nonsense Nelson
Coach Aaron
Saquon Barkley - 34.1 pts (2nd time this season!)
(Brady’s Jauan Jennings scored 45.8 pts, but cannot win both weekly awards.)
Looking at what happened this week in the IFL, one thing stood out, and no it wasn’t getting 45 points hung on me by some guy who spells his name J-A-U-A-N but does not pronounce it at all like you would imagine, or the fact that Brady’s team scored the most points by any team this seasons as a result (165 pts), or that Brady is now 3-0 against me since joining the Cul-de-Sack, or that Brady’s team is now the highest scoring team in the league on the season.
It was the fact that there are now FOUR 0-3 coaches: Jesse, John, Austin, and Nick.
That is an IFL first, besting the previous record of three coaches having 0-3 starts which occurred three times before (2022, 2020, & 2019).
Now, one of those coaches, Jesse, had not seemed like the others through the first two weeks, narrowly losing his first two matchups while averaging top 5 in scoring, but the Aspen Dummies did their best to get him there in week 3, scoring a league low for the season, 68 points to Jord’s Control Room, whose margin of victory was the highest by any team this season. Jord has to be feeling pretty good, despite being without his pride and joy Cooper Kupp, his picks up another win to go to 2-1, and is currently the third highest scoring team in the league. History tells us one or more of our 0-3 coaches will turn it around, but it will take a herculean effort from Austin and Nick, who are averaging less than 90 PPG, and have a combined all-play record of 7-83. Nick’s a 2-time champ, and Austin has shown us roller-coaster tendencies before, so don’t be surprised when they do exactly that. Scallon finds himself somewhere in between Jesse and the Nick/Austin starts, having been hit with a couple significant injuries, but his WR trio of MHJr, London and Kirk looks promising and could be dangerous any given Sunday.
On the other end of the spectrum, Ewoldt and the Course Rangers, knock off my season-favorite Hey Darnold! 140-108, to improve to 3-0 for the THIRD CONSECUTIVE SEASON (and 4th out of 5 seasons). Mind you, he’s only made the playoffs once in his three previous 3-0 starts, as is the Hype Zone tradition, but it’s amazing he continues to pull it off, no matter how lightly or heavily his team is auto-drafted. Duncan falls to 2-1 with TEN other teams, a just nutty amount of winning-record teams, due to our record high 0-3 teams.
TC also fell to 2-1, despite nearly pulling off the unlikely comeback against Hunt last night in MNF, falling just short, 105-108. Despite the higher production from Jaylen Daniels, compared to Caleb Williams, TC may win his blockbuster trade with Jord purely for the Malik Nabers pickup, who has posted back-to-back near 30-burgers, and whose highlight reel from week 3 is pretty eye-popping:
The best news this week is that Drew lost, getting Belichick’d by the Doc, 129-107, who improves to 2-1. All is right in the world.
X-IA increases their lead to 34, as the Cul-de-Sack claws their way into third place, and just a game back from the Boy Scout Cyclones.
Last year’s pick ‘em champ Qualley posts a perfect week and moves up to the top of the leaderboard. You dropped this, king 👑
